Slap in the Face

Sometimes I just don't understand.

Just when I'm building myself up to have my surgery on Wednesday I get what feels like yet another slap in the face...

I have to go in for bloodwork tomorrow morning because I am currently on cycle day 34 and still haven't gotten my period. Now before anyone gets excited, I already took a pregnancy test on Tuesday (cycle day 31) and it was negative.

In fact, the only reason I called the clinic was because I was concerned that not having my period could cause an issue with the surgery.

Of course as soon as she said that they wanted to send me for bloodwork to make sure I wasn't pregnant I immediately teared up. I know that there is about a 0.23% chance of me being pregnant right now, but there is still that little part of me that keeps hoping for a miracle.

The funny (?) thing is when my period didn't come around Day 25 (which it typically does) I was excited because I thought my cycle was going to be an average 28 day cycle. I thought perhaps the DHEA that my doctor prescribed was working.

One of the concerns I had when my period didn't come and I got the negative pregnancy test was that I was going into menopause. Thankfully when I voiced my concern with the lady from the Regional Fertitlity Clinic she reassured me that it was very unlikely and probably due to stress over my operation on Wednesday.

So I'll get up tomorrow and get the blood work done... even though I already know what the result will be.